School’s Out For Summer!

This week has been quieter than expected considering all three children have been off school. It’s been nice to switch off the school run alarms and just relax with them instead of rushing about. Friday saw them complete their final day which had me a little emotional as I realised just how much they’ve grown. That said, all three of them have made me incredibly proud of their growth over the past few months and I look forward to seeing how each handles the new challenges they face next school year.

I haven’t been doing all that much. My physical health is ok but my sleep pattern is all over right now so that’s left me out of sorts and this combined with being out of my usual routine has made it incredibly difficult to stick to my schedule, however I am trying. They say when you can’t sleep, it’s because you’re awake in someone else’s dream and if that’s the case, I really need that person to stop dreaming about me for a few days so I can sort my sleep pattern out 😂

One thing I did reflect on this week is how far me and the kids’ dad have come on our co parenting journey. We’ve had some really low times during navigating this co - parenting after separation journey, which has left us feeling resentment and frustration at each other in the past but when he was talking to them on the phone this week and I said hi casually to him and his partner, it dawned on me that we haven’t been hostile or disagreed on things in months. And this isn’t because either of us has been keeping quiet to keep the peace. There’s just been this sense of calm and unity across the board and it feels a bit like the rainbow after the storm moment. I’m happy, he’s happy and the kids are happy which is the most important thing in the world to both of us, individually. I doubt we’d ever be close friends again now, but I also have found it easier to let go of the past and not let it cloud my judgement moving forward. He’s stepping up, I'm stepping up and it feels like a team unit. His partner is the loveliest soul and has been so accommodating of the kids and the fact we still need to communicate when it comes to them. She also seems like a grounding presence to him which is really nice to see. I can honestly say, if you described our situation now to me a few years ago, I'd have laughed in your face and not believed it. But here we are. Older, wiser and working together to raise beautiful, smart, funny and kind children to be remarkable and wonderful adults someday. 

Another thing that’s been on my mind is how much music means to me. I thought the fact I need music every day as much as possible was normal but it turns out, not everyone does that. Which seems so weird to me. I don’t know if this is another thing I should be noting for the neuro spicy team to know about but I do know if anyone tried to stop me listening to music, my mental wellbeing would suffer greatly. Music is what shapes me and makes me who I am. It comforts me and it stabilises my mood. It’s also saved my life more than once. Not in that dramatic “omg you saved my life!” way. Just in a quiet “I nearly did something I wouldn’t have been able to undo” way. One of those songs is Fine Line by Harry Styles. Another example would be Breakdown by Yungblud. But there are a few I’ve never talked about. Maybe I’ll make a video about this at some point if you guys reading this are interested.

Anyway, I don’t have a lot more to say this week but remember to keep hydrated and to kind to others, we never know anyone else’s silent struggles and the way you treat someone could even silently save a life. Stay as positive as you can and have a wonderful week

Lotsa love

Soph xo